Honoring My Tone

The beauty of the mountain, sunlight and water mesmerized me for days.

The beauty of the mountain, sunlight and water mesmerized me for days.

I came down from my mountain high with a crash and landed in a valley of emotions. I returned to the California coast for a family wedding. I feel as though I have had my emotional body roto-rooted……all kinds of sludge and muck has been brought to the surface. Years of old emotional pain has been pulled up to the surface, seeking the light of love. I have had a good look at my “tone” and all the ways that it has isolated me in my life. I wore a hat of shame for an evening as I absorbed judgments for the way I participated in a discussion. I saw that truth is more important to me than peace.  Indeed, for me, truth is love. I saw all the waves of people and situations that fell from me as I held my tone.

Can I cherish myself while viewing all of these moments of my life? I felt each moment of pain afresh, as it moved through me. It was a life review while in the body. I have experienced this a few times in the past as I have walked this path. This one felt different as all that was shown had a common theme. I was granted a view from the human and soul perspective. From the soul’s viewpoint, the emotional charge is not there. All is clear. I have understood that clarity and tried to live it in my humanness, causing emotional storms. We are moving into greater clarity as our souls live more fully on this earth plane.

The only shelter and security is to be found within our hearts.

The only shelter and security is to be found within our hearts.

I saw how the energies are shifting, how my tone will be able to be held with gentleness rather than as a flaming sword that cleaves.  This a result of people facing their shadows to stand in their truth. I saw how our tones evolve through thoroughly loving the tone that has been. I came to a place of  honoring my willingness to stand in the censure of others to let truth have its voice. Honoring the way I have walked my truth in all of its imperfection. As I lay here and allowed myself to feel all of it, I came to appreciate the consistency with which I have held my tone held throughout my life. That in itself, is a remarkable achievement. I am accepting all aspects of myself with a deep and abiding love.

We have been taught to listen and interpret words as our means of communication. We are moving into a time of transparency and truth. Words can be used to obfuscate, manipulate, hide behind. Now we are given the gift of greater communication as we begin to read the energy field of a person. We can sense the package of information our fields are putting out as well as hear the words. Where there is disparity, there is a discordant tone that is unpleasant to the ear. Where the words and the field are one, a tone of harmony is emitted. This is our work, to harmonize our fields and walk in that oneness.

I have allowed this dissolution of my being, witnessing all aspects of myself, laid bare. No desire to gather them, to reform them. Content to melt into the earth. My personality self felt the old desire to flee the pain presented. I watched the parade of voices, many from years past, come through touting their wares:

  • Start an exercise program, then you will feel better. You seem to quit after a few days, what is wrong with you?
  • It is all about diet, just eat right and your world will be right. You know you eat too much sugar.
  • Meditate 20 minutes a day and your life will be perfect. It has to be a scheduled routine to be effective.
  • Just follow the plan, do not make waves, accept the cultural paradigm and life will ease up. Here are ten easy steps to get there. 

I lay there and laughed. And laughed some more. Really? This is all you have for me? All of these are programs that assist us to judge ourselves. We are told how to feel rather than allowing ourselves to discover anything for ourselves. We are fed a daily dose of judgment that reinforces the notion that we are not good enough, not smart enough, not thin enough, not wealthy enough, not, not, not! We need a diet plan, a money making plan, a brain exercise plan…….left to our own devices we might just discover that we are powerful, perfect beings of lovelight, come to create heaven on earth.

This little guy was one of the gifts left outside my tent door by the elementals. One day it was a bark heart, one day a few berries, a heart rock. All signs of how all the kingdoms want to support and create with us.

This little guy was one of the gifts left outside my tent door by the elementals. One day it was a bark heart, one day a few berries, a heart rock. All signs of how all the kingdoms want to support and create with us.

For now, there is no impulse to move, to do or be anything. I am letting go of the new age, the new earth, the idea of ascension, the idea of myself as a spiritual being. My dear body is here, she breathes and continues to hold a form. I have no desire to preserve this form. I see myself lying on the desert sand, adding to its dust. This gives me a  feeling of peace. Dissolving into the void that I am. The Oneness that exists within each cell.  I watch the sheets drying on the line, and am mesmerized by the form that the wind provides; billowing fat and full by its gusts, hanging limp and flat, in its stillness, edges curling in a soft dance as the wind teases it to soft movement.

I offer myself to the elements, the elemental being of my body, in play with sun, wind, rain, people, faeries, electronics, ley lines, all of it. No will directing this course, trusting to the Creator as the birds and the flowers do. I will come to my flowering as it is part and parcel of my being. Unhinging the mind that believed it was essential to survival. Sitting in my heart, unattached to outer form, to any idea of good or bad, happy life or sad.

View from my tent, camping spot of my dream.

View from my tent, camping spot of my dream.

I am here. And everywhere. Beliefs dissolved. Cords of attachment cut. Will the rain melt me? Will the mountains meld with me? The sylphs of the air have given me direction these past years. Now the where, who, what, how……..are all blowing in the wind. I am the wind. All one. I rest.

 

 

 

 

 

Dropping into the River of Love

One of Gabriel's recent paintings. Look at all the individual parts creating the whole tapestry.

One of Gabriel’s recent paintings. Look at all the individual parts creating the whole tapestry.

It has been an interesting few days, moving more deeply into that river of love that exists just below the surface world. I spoke with many of my “tribe” in the past few days, sharing our feelings of something massive on the horizon. There is such a sense of excitement and joy welling up, the knowing deepening that all is well. The collective pulse of the planet seems to be one of weariness with life, as it currently presents itself. People are wanting freedom, connection, meaning, peace. Hearts are crying out for this and our Creator is responding. I can feel the waves of joy and love flowing below the surface, awaiting the moment when they shall flood our beings with liquidlovelight.

I have been invited deeper into the river of love, my I Am presence beckoning. I am singing with her in the waters…..last night as I skinny dipped in the pool under the moonlight, I found myself singing a love song to myself and the all that is. The oneness is palpable, the love a cloak I wear.  It is time, letting go on every level, every tethering tie cut, free to float and dream ourselves into the new earth. I am no longer anchoring to the earth, as I best flow the energies as I move in my bubble of lovelight. I experience this as a floating sensation. I was shown that I am to unhook from all that is known, so as to more deeply anchor in the new earth. All we have known here is form and we are moving into the formless.

Oh, the beauty of our diversity!

Oh, the beauty of our diversity!

There is no one practice that will take us there other than our desire and complete surrender to the love. We have created so many systems and rules to follow as we handed over our power to others. We construct these pathways to enlightenment as if any of us can determine another’s road. It reminds me of my past as an educator when we would be given training in new methods that were “the key” for student learning. Each one touted as the holy grail of learning, none stating the obvious, that there was no one method that worked with all children. It is the same in the spiritual communities, with all its hype and constructs. Diet is big, if you eat meat, you cannot ascend, if you have oral sex, no ascension (that was one of the “rules” from a new age group we were part of for years, supposedly channeled by El Morya, my love.), chanting is way to bliss, crystals will take you there, rock music will not, sacrifice is noble, caring for self, is not, meditation is crucial, daydreaming not, liberals are good, conservatives are not. On and on it goes. I embraced many of these rules, being a “good girl” for so long. The interesting thing about all these rules or practices, is that they all bring separation and judgment. Vegans judging meat eaters, meditators judging non- meditators, enlightened judging the masses and so it goes. All labels separate. Why do we feel a need for a label? Why do we want to proclaim ourselves as this or that? Why do we need a system someone else created to follow instead of listening to our hearts? We have trained to trust others, not ourselves. All, a false security blanket. Whether it is labeling ourselves by our profession, our diet, our religious beliefs, our weight, our ethnicity, our gender……..all of it is separation. All of it implies good or better, right or wrong. All of it implies judgment taking us out of the oneness. All takes us from unity consciousness. When we stand naked in front of our Creator, it is the light that we are that is read. All the rest is illusion, a mere costume put on to more fully play our role. Dark cape, white cape……all just a role. The light of the soul is what is everlasting and true.

Saw this on a tombstone, what an epitaph for a life!

Saw this on a tombstone, what an epitaph for a life!

We are being asked to let go. To honor the holiness of each one’s path. To walk my path does not mean that I must judge another’s wrong so as to feel more secure in the rightness of mine. I choose to follow where my heart leads, trusting it explicitly to guide my steps. In that trusting, I also trust your heart to lead you to your truth. I cannot know what that is. I do not need to know the whys of your path, nor even mine. I can surrender and allow, you to your path and me to mine.

This has allowed me to come to a place of freedom and expansion. No rules to follow, only joy to allow. I live the joy path. It is about your vibration that fuels the action, not the action. If eating a piece of meat feels like joy, I do it, blessing the animal for their gift as I bless the air I breath and the water washing my back. It is vibration, what are you feeling as you eat this, perform an action, speak words? It is all so simple that I find myself laughing much of the time. I love the contradictions as they express through me, I am this and that! I love breaking out of the boxes labels create. There is only love. The love leads me ever closer to more of me. My heart has been patiently waiting for me to stop the outer search and practices to drop down into her womb of love. She embraces me with the tenderest of care and effortlessly leads me on. The holy grail that I have sought, found. The wonder, the recognition of how I am loved, the awe of love’s power, all have flooded me. My cells are singing a love song to me and of me. I celebrate my radiance, I rejoice in this resurrection. I claim my light and allow it to live me fully. No more backing away from the magnificence that I AM. I am ready to allow it to live me.

A close up of the above painting, it looks to me like a girl with a ponytail sitting next to a boy, both with caps on. They have brought their part to the whole, just as we are
asked to. Can you find it in the painting? Just to right of center. Life is this way, we each see a different view yet together we create the whole.

We are all ascending together, every one of us, asked to live their divinity on a greater level, everyone is birthing their gift that they have brought from Home. My only “job” is to be the fullest expression of myself that I can be. To be the greatest version of Linda Marie that I am capable of in each moment. There is no one way that looks, it can be anger in a moment, tears in another, laughter in the next. All my truth, all expressions of my heart dancing on this plane. She is my guiding light as she is Home, one with the Creator which means I AM also.

It is about joy! Joy is love expressed…….this is what creates. We are invited to open ourselves to joy, it is our birthright and it is time to claim it. Rejoice! I am drinking the elixir of  expansion. It is intoxicating! Your heart is waiting to serve you yours right now. Take the offered cup, drink deeply of the love. Allow it to work its magic. You will feel my heart as I feel yours. We are all connected in this river of love. I love you.

Art is available at gaberobertsart.com

Equinox Offers a New Operating System Based on Love

The equinox offers us a bridge between the old ways and the new. Let's cross over together!

The equinox offers us a bridge between the old ways and the new. Let’s cross over together!

I awoke at 5:55 a.m. Numbers are such a fun way to connect. I smiled as I looked up its meaning: Buckle your seatbelt, a major life change is upon youBe in a place of allowing and receive what is on the way to you. This is an exciting time. You have already done much of the inner work and have drawn this to you. You are ready and now the fruits of your labor will manifest in your physical world.

The rain dancing on the pool water entranced and refreshed me. Ha, we can refresh our own page and allow our lens to be cleared!

The rain dancing on the pool water entranced and refreshed me. Ha, we can refresh our own page and allow our lens to be cleared!

 

I am ready!! I have been awakening to that message for the past couple of months. As a collective, I feel we are ready for peace, for harmony, for joy to manifest for all. I am feeling into the possibilities that this day of balance brings to us. We had a beautiful rain here yesterday in my part of California, first of the season. It felt like a cleansing, a purifying in preparation for today’s energy to stream in. I reveled in the feeling of pulling on the warmth of a sweater and the way my feet felt in slippers on the wood floor. I baked cookies as the oven heat now made sense and stirred soup on the stove. There is a deliciousness to the change of season that excites me on so many levels. I felt energized and enlivened, ready to greet the new.

One aspect of this newness is how words are shrinking in importance and the energy of the heart is growing. I open an email and am flooded with a wave of the feeling behind the words. I write a blog and feel a wave of all who read it. Someone offers a judgment of me and I feel how they are judging themselves and asking for a flood of love in response. Our truth is flowing out in streams of radiant light. I was laughing to myself that soon we will greet each other with an upraised palm and beam messages to one another’s heart. As I felt this, I laughed as all the messages were variations on the theme: “I LOVE YOU”. What if all of our words truly can be reduced to this one sentiment? I love you! I love you! I love you! Offered to everyone and most of all offered to ourselves. I LOVE ME! We are all love, here to remind one another of our truth. We seek to be seen, to be acknowledged, to be heard, to be loved! In loving another, we see them, we witness their beauty and reflect it back to them.

A friend told me of witnessing two folks she knew to be rather dour and silent acting in a new way when with one another. One was an elderly woman and the other a middle aged man. Somehow, they were able to drop their masks before the other and reveal themselves. The elderly woman beamed her affection and the man became the gallant knight, assisting the lady in any way he could. Each was beaming a pure space of love to the other that allowed them to  transform into playful, happy, loving beings.  What if this was possible for all of us? We become habitual in our relationships, seeing one another through a lens that has become clouded over the years by unkindness, criticism, pain and judgment. We become merged with our roles, afraid to change costumes and walk away from roles that no longer fit. What if we were to drop that lens and choose a new crystal clear one? Not only with those close to us but with all people we encounter. How would it feel to view others without the fog of judgment? Can we view without the need to compare ourselves to what we see? Can we reject the “I am better or I am less than” view of one another? Dare we see and feel for the lovelight that we know to be present in all? Can we look with an ear to hearing the music of the other’s soul playing its love song to us? Are we courageous enough to view suffering and feel the other’s heart? Can we witness dark deeds and offer a prayer for the confusion present and love for the heart crying out to be cradled?

I believe we are ready for this! Our hearts were made for this. We know how to beam lovelight, it is what our hearts were created to do! Today, on this day of newness, as we are born into this new earth by virtue of our nine months gestation period from December 21, 2012, let us determine to use our senses as they were meant to be used. Let us opt for the new operating system that renders obsolete judgment, comparisons, duality in any form, self loathing, self deprecation.

My youngest son's lastest painting allows me to move into a new landscape and hear the trees speak their love for me/us.

My youngest son’s lastest painting allows me to move into a new landscape and hear the trees speak their love for me/us.

Let us fire up our hearts and step into a space of unity consciousness where LOVE and only love is what our heart hears and responds to. It is what we all seek and how wonderful that we are all equipped to give it lavishly to ourselves and one another. See through the eyes of love, hear the music of love, speak in tones of love, taste the fruit of love, feel and touch with hands of love. Let love guide you moment to moment. We can do this. We were created for this!  I love us so!

 

 

Filling Myself With Light

IMG_2496 I felt such a shift in the energies the past couple of days. I slept for most of one day, pulled under over and over again. I was a cat on the floor, following the sun shining in the back glass doors with my pillow and blanket. I was close to the warmth of the fire, getting up every now and again to throw on another log, fetch a glass of water, take a bathroom break,  and move my pillow up a bit so the sun was on my face. I knew that my job was to fill myself up with as much light as I could. I did venture outside to sit for a bit, wrapped in a warm sweater but the elements were too extreme for the way I was feeling. I was a tender babe, needing the utmost comfort. It felt like all I could do to maintain this routine throughout the day. Breathe in light, radiate it to the earth and out to the grid. Over and over. I was a battery being charged. I was birthing a sun in me.

The day before I had participated in a healing of a young woman who had suffered a great deal of abuse in some of the imaginative ways the divine feminine has been defiled. She carried an entity that needed to be released back to the light. That was interesting as the energy was so different from my former dealings with entities. I no longer held any negative judgment towards the entity, rather saw it as something that had become stuck in an old pattern and needed a loving hand to assist its movement forward. We acknowledged the role it had played for this woman, thanked it and sent it on its way with love. It moved with ease and gratitude back to its rightful home. My friend’s crystal bowls do amazing work in clearing so much from the body and energy fields. We added sound which aids in the movement. This woman was so full of light. She had endured much in her young life, and was ready to turn it all into a new story of love and strength. What amazing souls are on this planet! She came to do huge work and it was lovely to be able to acknowledge that for her and reassure her that the pain was now past. It will never be as hard, as dense again. We are creating a world that will be safe for women and children. It is coming by the choices we each make to flood all with love.

If we can create places of safety that this deer enjoys in the nature center where I walk, we can create a world that is safe for women and children. In fact, for all sentient beings!

I was shown how all that comes in my field now is for the collective. We truly are becoming one. I can listen dispassionately to tales at the denser end of the spectrum and hold it all in a space that allows the love to be reborn. I was lying on the floor, filling myself with light to send into all the places that this young woman had highlighted for me. She opened a river of experience that was ripe for transformation. I could feel this frequency clearly from her and was able to ride into that field of energy with my liquidlovelight. What a gift. It demands all of my attention and a focused intention to hold a container that allows love to weave its magic threads. It creates such a healing fabric, a soft pink blanket of peace. To wrap the perpetrators as well as the ones we would label victims in the old vocabulary. Now, we know that all are co-creators, choosing to experience dense energies in order to transform them. The ones who commit the acts of abuse are so in need of the power of love and on a soul level have volunteered to play out this darker role. I blessed them all for their service to the collective. As we clear our energy fields of all hatred, pain, anger, worry, frustration and so much more, we make these darker roles obsolete. When we no longer carry any of this violence and hatred in our fields, peace will flood the land.

IMG_2512The underpinnings of the old earth have been swept away as this great surge of love has anchored into and on the planet. What remains is held in place by our attention to it. It appears solid yet it is as ephemeral as smoke. As we wean ourselves from the lower vibrations and the matrix reality we have lived in, it will collapse. There is no fixing the old systems, as they provide no worthy foundation to build upon. We are tasked with creating the new by our dreaming, our intention and our focused attention on what we desire. Whatever we focus on, is what we choose to have grow. We are entering a time of great freedom and joy. With it comes great responsibility. Our thoughts are creative, each word spoken a vessel of energy. It is a time to chose and act wisely. Everything done in love, creates a field of love. We can wash our dishes in a state of love,  pay for what we need in a state of gratitude for the abundance in our lives, thank our mother for each drink of water and bite of food that her ground has grown.  Each thought of love, each word spoken in kindness, each action of compassion, creates our new earth. This is what we came to do and the time has truly arrived. There is no more waiting. Let us begin.

 

Crowning: Preparing to See our own Beauty

The sky brings new delights each day.

There has been so much inner movement that time seems to have melted away. There is only the now and the stillness. All feels sacred to me. I know the blessing of these holy days and treat them as such. All movement, all thought, all feeling moves toward the one goal…..the ascension of our planet and ourselves with her.

I am frequently overcome with tears as I feel my own light moving,  expanding within me. The task is no longer to see if I have the strength to stand in adversity and density but rather, am I able to stand in the brilliance of my own light. Each moment, it becomes more familiar, more comfortable , more accessible. The gratitude for the gift of knowing myself on a deeper level, is immense. We have been so trained to handle darkness, now we are being asked to step into light and love like we have not tasted since first taking incarnation on the earth. This takes some deep breathing!

Moments from these past few days:

A dream in which I was a child with a sibling of whom, I felt very protective. Another child came into the family with intent to harm my sibling. I tried to alert my parents of the danger but they could not hear me. As I faced this child who seemed to embody all evil,  I was terrified. I heard: “Empty yourself.” The fear drained out of me. Then the injunction: “Fill yourself with love.” With my heart afire, the being melted into the love. What a powerful reminder that there is no force that can stand in the presence of love, it is the ultimate power.

 

A heart on my walk, always the love.

The incident in Connecticut, opening hearts world wide to cry out, No more! Our hearts and souls are clearly stating that we desire to live in a world of peace, where all children are cherished and each one knows that they are loved and are needed. Where all souls know themselves as a vital part of their pod or group and are free to sing their song. As expressed by an acquaintance, Judith Moore:

“These are the days of the soul, the soul of the world, the soul of the human experience, crying out for something better, something more beautiful, something that sustains the life of the sacred planet.”

The Mother's heart standing vigil for all souls

Waves of toning coming through as my voice expresses the sorrow, the lamentations, the joys of this human experience. I have felt humanity as part of me, as we move into the oneness. I have been experiencing waves upon waves of gratitude for each soul on this earth. Knowing all have played their role to perfection, those asleep and those awake (another form of separation as we now know there is no other). My heart has been exploding with the love as I felt their hearts.  What a holy and sacred time. Yes, many will leave with the old consciousness in order to lighten the entry into the new for all of us. My heart thanks them and blesses them on their journey into the light.

News of a cousin choosing to leave by suicide. Feeling her torment as the love that is pouring in has released all the shadows to be felt before being released into the love. It can be overwhelming and many are choosing to take that confusion energy with them. I bless their journey and call in the angels of comfort for those left with the aching heart.

I I had a dream as a gatekeeper, ushering so many souls through a doorway to the new light. What joy! The next day, I read of the role of gatekeepers and felt the confirmation sweep through me that I have been in training for this role.

Tulips feeding my soul with spoonfuls of joy.

I have felt the absolute certainty that the solutions to all of our problems on this earth will abound in rapid succession.  As the weight of oppression that we have lived under, lifts, we will see an explosion of creativity and joy. We are an amazing creative species! What exciting times are ahead.

I participated in a 12-12-12 event with a few other women. We took turns using drums, rattles and crystal bowls to heal what each felt arise within. I knew we were doing it on a planetary scale as the light beings and angels filled the room. We released grief, mind chatter in order to be present, shame (that was a sticky one!), judgment, and removed barriers to receiving love as well as opening to laughter and play. Wow! It was a magical, power filled evening as I could feel so much leaving the planet as the new gifts came in.

I embraced my divinity. I am no longer waiting until I am some idea of perfection. I embrace my divinity in my present state, knowing I am love. Knowing all that is less than love is now consumed by the love of my heart. I am a divine spark of my Mother/Father and I know myself as a delight in their hearts. It is a powerful knowing.

Preparing to walk through the doorway to my divinity and Christ Self.

Truly what we do for ourselves, we do for one another. How can we not love everyone and everything!!! All works for the all……the win- win world, the highest good of all. I so love this universe we are playing in, this beautiful mother who has waited so long for her babes to be ready to move with her, our hearts that are so earnest in our desire to be the love that we are. We are co-creating the new earth now. Each moment we are being asked, what do you want? I want love. I love you and I love me and I love everyone! This year, we will experience the true meaning of Christmas as we birth the Christ in our hearts. Prepare your manger bed well for She/He cometh. May we all be blessed in this love.

Each twinkling light, a heart on fire with its divinity!

Pinned to the Earth While the Shadows Dance

Thank God for the glow lighting the end of this path. It is getting narrower by the day yet that glow beckons me onward.

Whew, the energies for this earth woman have been intense these past couple of days! I felt pressed into the earth, any movement took enormous effort. I was to be searching for an apartment but that felt as reachable as climbing Mt Everest. Not a possibility. I allowed myself to relax into this pulling.  What else could I do? I have learned to move with the energies rather than against them. When a way is opened up and the energy is aligned, all falls into place quickly and with ease. To try to move because my mind has decided to make something happen…. that is hard. My body will take over and stop me at times. These days, I am allowing my heart to move me. I need to find a place to live and know that it will happen. But not today. I allow myself to drop into that place of peace, listening to the birds, while the sun warms me.

One of my simple pleasures, fresh squeezed orange juice. It is like drinking sunshine.

The  mind moves in and out with its various refrains, “Where are you going to live? You need to know now! ” All testing my peace, my beingness in this now moment. Will I trust that all will come to me in its perfect time? Will I trust that I am in my perfect place right now? Yes, I will trust it all. I am grateful for my former husband allowing me this space and time to be until I can move. He does not understand it, even fears it yet he allows. That is not easy. I am grateful to feel peace in a place that once held such sadness, anger, and pain for me. Of course, that is why it is my perfect place in this moment! If I can feel peace here, it is likely that I can feel peace anywhere.

The light is flooding in to illuminate our shadows so that we can become whole.

Talk about shadow dancing! The usual cast of characters strut their stuff once again:”What are you doing with your life? Why are you in this place again? Your money is running out, you will have nothing. You need to DO something, anything!” At times I can laugh and say, “Enough, you will have to be more creative than that to get my attention! ” Sometimes it is a “Be on your way,  with my love.” Other times, I am caught in the throes of it and have to wrestle my way out. I am learning that shadow work requires deep breathing and moving into observation mode. You have to take a seat in the audience and watch the characters play across the stage of your mind. When I can clearly appreciate the acting, I can detach and see it for what it is. When I get caught up in the play, I go on an emotional roller coaster ride that is often not pleasant.  I have witnessed shadows that I did not even realize were there, entering the stage. Every last trigger is being pulled now to allow all to be transformed by the light of my love.

Field of lupines on my walk by the river

Others judgements of me and my path are coming in as I am moving into a space of non-judgment. I am watching as I try their judgements on for size, finding resonance for a moment or sometimes more until I return to my own truth. Am I enmeshed with my sons? Have I limited their paths? Yikes, shadows of my mother and my brothers……is this me? These shadows know just what swords (words) to raise and where the Achilles heel is to aim for. Yes, my relationship with my sons is unusual. We have a soul agreement to bring in a template for the New Divine Human. That may sound presumptuous, crazy even, but it is our truth. Over and over I am being asked to stand in that truth without wavering. It is not a path for the faint of heart.

A feather cloud with a rainbow in its tail......magic

My path is unusual as there is nothing to point to that aligns with success as our old world defined it.  If I would write the book, sell my art, establish a healing practice or do anything “normal” then some folks who love me could breath easier. Heck, I could breath easier!!! Some of those things may come but none have been my focus. I am called to be all of me, to be in tune with the earth and sing her song in my heart. To feel my brothers and sisters and weave my heartlight with theirs, seeing their beauty and light. Standing on this earth, moving with intention and love in every moment…..takes all I have. I awake filled with my Creator’s love and I strive to be the most beautiful vessel that I can be for Her/His love to flow through.

Wisteria trees with their fragrant magenta blossoms and the palm trees.....appreciating my old yard.

I  have given most things in my life 150% effort. No halfway, half hearted attempts. It is no different now except it is internal and not visible to the old world. I am in the New Earth much of the time, clearing pathways, arranging flowers, decorating so that when others walk in, they will feel welcomed. This  is the work that my soul calls me to. Are there times that I would like to quit? Yes! Are there times that I wish that I could live a “normal life”? Yes but that was ever the case even when I was living a so called normal life, I did not fit in with the crowd. We are all being called to live our truth. To live each moment with all of who we are. We are experiencing internal earthquakes as our shadows dance deep emotions into our cores. Can we love ourselves, forgive ourselves, embrace ourselves with compassion and kindness? Can we release these aspects of ourselves back to the light (call in the violet flame to transmute your anger, your sadness, your fears back to light, offer it as mulch for our Mother Earth) so as to allow room for our divinity to enter in? Yes, our souls and I Am presences are here, asking to be invited in. We have to clean out the shadows to make room. This is holy work. Honor yourself for having the courage to do it. Call in support from your angels, your guides, your friends. We need one another to affirm our beauty when we get tangled in our shadows and can’t find our way out.

I love balancing rocks, it helps me keep my balance these days.

Thank you for having the courage to do this work. You widen the pathway for others and you lighten our Mother’s load. It is spring cleaning time. We feel inspired to clean our houses, to clean our body through cleanses and fasts. Now it is time to clean our emotional and spiritual bodies as well. Put on some music and dance your way through it, stomp your way through it, cry your way through it. Feel it in every cell, thank it and let it go with love. Freedom is at hand and this is the way to it.

 

Forgiveness of Self……

the magolia tree that I chose and helped plant years ago at my former home, revisited this spring to witness its beauty.

I just posted a blog indicating that I deleted the one from the day before. I have reconsidered and instead have edited it and decided to post what remained. The reason is that it was a knee jerk reaction in the old way. I was punishing myself as my mind was saying, ” How can you write about love when you just found yourself judging another? That if I observed a flaw in myself, then I am flawed all the way through. Old energy of self punishment. I am a complex character, holding great light as well as darker aspects. All of me is desiring to be only love. I ask for this each day, to be a living chalice of lovelight to be used by the Creator for the good of all. That is my heart’s intent. And as my call is answered with more love flooding in, the tides must wash out what no longer resonates. For this, my heart rejoices  but my personality self felt shame. I am allowing that to wash away on the tide of love that has once again flooded my being tonight. This is progress, in the old days I would have been laid low for a week from this experience. Thank you Creator for these quicker, lighter energies that move us to our truth.

Yesterday felt like the first day of Spring here in Northern California. The sun was shining, the air felt fresh rather than chilly and the earth emitted that delicious smell that portends new growth. I laid my blanket on the ground and took a nap. It was still a bit damp and cold yet my body soaked it in like a sponge. I so needed that elemental connection with my mother. This magnolia tree that I chose and planted years ago at my former family home was a delight to visit it as it opened its blossoms to the sky. What a color! The blossoms like hearts of love opening just as hearts are opening all over the world. What a time we live in! To witness this love explosion happening on the planet is a gift from our Creator.

The new moon stirred up the energies and it felt a bit unsettling as they swirled about. My eldest son texted me that he felt so emotional, weepy as if all boundaries between him and others had disappeared. He could feel each one’s heart and it was almost painful. He is a druid of old, a nature being with a deep connection to the earth. The energies move through him on a level most of us have not felt. I honored him for his pure heart of love and suggested he change his plans of the day to match his vibration. He was headed into San Francisco but needed to lie under his favorite oak tree in a park and be still. He chose the latter and we all benefited from that choice. When we care for ourselves, we care for all. When we allow the peace to enter in, we are being peace for the earth. This is such a fundamental lesson that we are not taught. We are all wired differently, all connected to the earth, the oceans, the sky in different ways. We are learning to honor the ways of our bodies and spirits. We are leaving behind the idea of “normal” and embracing the uniqueness as well as the oneness of all. In the past, we have cast out the mystics, the dreamers, the wanderers, who do not fit in one of society’s pegs. In the present time they are often our homeless wandering the streets. Now we are opening the door to them. I feel such a tenderness for all beings, for each one’s special gift. My daily prayer is for each person to know their own beauty and to share it openly with the world. A friend sent a poem with a line that lingered: “How strange now that I am walking my path, others see me as wasting my life.” He had stepped off the wheel of the working day world, letting go the house, the marriage, the job to enter into the mystery that has called his name. He is writing beautiful poetry and feeling new connections within. This is the blossoming of the soul that is happening all over this planet at warp speed. The heart is emerging as the pathfinder and no longer believes the limitations set by the mind and conditioned by society.

The love that is emerging on the planet is so much larger than any idea we have held. Recently I noticed how we are moving from our minds to our hearts. The old way was to allow our minds to have full rein, to attempt to control situations and people.The mind is what keeps the story churning, believing it can “make sense” of a situation if it only “thinks” enough. This is the lie.(How many hours did I spend trying to figure things out over the years!!)  It is only by turning to the wisdom of the heart, that truth can be known. I understand only too well that place of being stuck in the monkey mind and how difficult it is to surrender and let the story go. I was living there for so long.

The more we grow on this path of love, the clearer it becomes that what appears as suffering, has a higher purpose for the soul. I trust that this is the path that the soul has chosen to awaken further to their own truth. Suffering is often a catalyst for awakening, certainly it has been in my life. I am so grateful for every moment that it took before I turned to my heart and saw truth. I used to beat myself up for how long it did take but  have discovered that it takes as long as it takes for us to awaken. I had to forgive myself for all the years that I suffered and know that was what it took for my soul. (if you read the post on humility you will see that here I thought I had forgiven myself but there was another layer yet to go, shadows can be tricky characters) All that I perceived as coming from the outside to harm me, was a reflection of my not valuing my own worth and giving away my own power. 377923_150023841763777_100002684869050_174562_322300789_n-300x191.jpg

This photo was posted on facebook and I so love it! I do not know the person who took it but acknowledge your great photo skills! It expresses the liquid lovelight that I bathe in each day. Can you feel it?

We are truly entering into the new earth. The changes are apparent in our hearts. This is how it happens, not through some big revolution, though there will be changes in the outer structures of society, but it comes by way of the heart. Each person, letting go, loosening their ideas of right and wrong, good and bad. Returning love for anger, softness where there is hardness, peace rather than judgment. The hearts speaking rather than the mind. We are witnessing an inner revolution in the space of each one’s heart. Tune in to yours today. Love it dearly for the dearness that you are and remember to “turn on your heartlight” so that others can see it shine!

 

Humility

What a day of lessons for me. I have taken down my post from yesterday and ask for an open heart of any who read it before I deleted it. If you read it, you would have witnessed judgment loud and clear from me. My shadow came leaping out in my need to judge a friend who was going through a difficult time. I was so uncomfortable with what I perceived as her pain that I  judged her rather than allowing myself to be with her. I used her as my mirror, I was still holding judgment of myself for how long it took me to wake up. For how long I stayed in suffering mode at the end of my marriage and the time it took for me to recover myself. I violated her trust by writing a judgment of her on my blog. Big shadow stuff…..processing it, asking for forgiveness from her, forgiving myself.

I had no idea that was still there. I had to sit for a time to really process this and get some understanding of what this shadow aspect was about. Wow, powerful stuff. My it is hard to forgive ourselves and let it go. Here I am cruising along, feeling more love each day and then this. I know that as more love comes in, all that is not love must flow out. I have watched this happen to others, felt it for myself but this was somehow trickier for me to catch. Now here it is for me to learn from. Whew…..not fun but I am grateful for this. I do not have to attach to this but rather see it, feel it and let it go. I know the words and now have to breathe deep to live them.

Linda to self: “OK, dear little one who thought that you did it all wrong, come here. It is alright that you suffered as you did. It all helped you to come to this place of knowing your own heart light. To understand that you are love and lovable. You were courageous, you are dear. You gave love and did not know that you had to learn to love yourself first. You are learning that now. It is all ok. You are safe now and are in my heart of love. I love you.”

I feel such gratitude that this storm came, that it shook me so deeply and turned my heart upside down. I am asking to continue to be bathed in liquid lovelight and to let go of all that is not love in my heart. I am grateful to my dear friend’s heart, for forgiving me. I am grateful for the moment to moment opportunity to begin anew with God’s love. I am grateful for my I Am presence for speaking truth to my heart and showing me what this shadow asked of me. Love. All of us seek love. Every part of us seeks love, especially the parts we disown. I had hidden this part so well that I did not even know it was there until it was! I pray for all my shadows to come out of hiding and to enter into the light of my heart. I pray for this for me and for all of our hearts. I bow to the power of love.