Transparency and Clearing our Hearts

This image is of in installation called Wood Line by Andy Goldsworthy. My sister and I walked along it (actually I walked on it, balancing as I raced along) in the Presidio of San Francisco. For me it reflects the clearing of my pathway through the jungle of my heart. Yes, you can see that I am not laying a straight path, rather it meanders and follows a rhythm of its own as it moves toward the light. It is a work in progress and there is always more jungle to clear and new paths to lay.

Strange couple of days. Full moon brought up the emotions yet today I was simply drifting all day. Bit of recovery from a wonderful full on week with my sister. Nice to have the time and space to be alone and simply BE. I definitely need the balance of social and solitude.

I have been experiencing the transparency that is happening on a planetary level. We are seeing it in government, corporations and in our personal lives. Folks are finding old stuff coming up to be released. I am watching the fears come up, will each of us still be accepted if this is known about us? Will people still love me if they learn of this behavior? I was in a nail salon with my sister getting a manicure and pedicure and leafing through the magazines that they had. One of the topics was that the current bachelor (of a reality dating show) had a criminal past that had come to light. He was asked if he believed in second chances for folks, considering that he had this past. He said that he believed in giving folks ten chances or more to remake themselves. I agree with him. Our Creator has gifted us with these opportunities over and over in life, in each moment we can be born anew.

I am so grateful for all of this as it is freeing us from shame, guilt, old hurts and wounding. A friend was sharing her concern that some incident from her past could be a roadblock as she applied for a new job. I could see the shame that was attached to the incident and how it was being transmuted as she courageously spoke of it. By speaking of it and being witnessed, the charge was lessened. To me it seemed insignificant yet she had been holding herself hostage to it. How wonderful that we can find compassion for ourselves for all the living that we have done. For every misstep that we believe that we have taken, we have gained an understanding of another part of life, of another group of souls. It is all part of the pattern of life.

Think of the weight that is being lifted off the planet as each of us lets our shadow side come to the light of day. As we expose and embrace all parts of ourselves, the dark is literally turned to light. I see it like a flower that finally has access to water and sunlight and can begin to grow to that light. We are all flowering, all blossoming into our essence. It is so beautiful! I can feel the lightening on Gaia’s heart as she can breathe more deeply. We were taught that hiding parts of ourselves was the way to freedom but it turns out to the be just the opposite. The hiding was our anchor, keeping us small. The more we expose all of ourselves to the light, the more freedom we have. It is amazing to feel that expansiveness as layers are peeled away.

Last night I participated in a group meditative journey with a woman who channels the Goddess of Light. The Goddess focused on clearing out our old memories on a conscious and unconscious level. I have been asking to let it all go. Drop all the memories of this and other lifetimes. I want to be fully present in the here and now. After the journey, the Goddess takes questions. I asked to clear anything that remained in way of love filling all of my being. She said that she saw a wooden stake and a rope that I had tethered my heart to in some way as a means of protection. She asked me to breathe down deep and release all that I could. I did this as she worked on me and felt a letting go. She laughed and said that it was fun to see it release so deeply. A big sigh of relief to me! I feel my heart getting lighter, expanding so that I can live more of my moments in the reality of love. That is the home that I keep returning to.

It is not all light and rosebuds, nor bliss as yet. There are moments of that but the past couple of days I feel almost separate from myself. I know that I am here and yet so much of me seems to be busy somewhere else. I watch all of this with a sense of tenderness. I weep easily at so many random things; a father holding his child’s hand and stopping with her to examine something on the ground, a group of old men playing games of chance on the street, laughing and arguing with one another, a flower in the moment of its disassembling as its petals let go. I find myself so dear these days. That in turn, leads me to find others so dear. We are all trying our best to do good, to be good. We want peace on earth, harmony and abundance for all. We are remembering that we are our brothers’ keepers. I love feeling the competition and striving fall away. It is so easy to give praise to others as I see so much that is praiseworthy as we each do this heavy lifting of clearing our emotional bodies of the dross. We have all suffered earthquakes, explosions, fires and tsunamis in our worlds. We have been tested again and again as we walk the landscape of the heart. We are clearing our pathways and trails now. All that has been neglected and overgrown must now be cut back and pruned. We can come out of the jungle of old emotions, we can heal the old scars. I love being conscious of this as I feel so in tune with our Mother Earth. She is working to clear and heal the old dense energies on her surface. We are working in tandem, as I release and clear my energies, I am clearing my place on her. As she clears an area, I feel a co responding lightness in my being. I can be a vessel for dense energies to move off of her surface and she can funnel lightness and strength to me. More and more, I feel a sense of awe at how our lives are so beautifully orchestrated and how carefully we have crafted them for our healing and growth. We are coming home to ourselves. We are finding that our inner landscapes are the wonders of the world and we have been carrying them with us all along.

My most fervant wish is that each one of us awakens to the beauty of our own hearts and begins to sing our note of gladness. Oh, how our Mother’s heart will tremble and be overcome with the joy of it. I can feel it as my own. Of course, it is my heart and mine hers. She is my mother and I, her dear child.

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